So, this poster tells you how I feel lately. Here's a quick list of things that have brought out my stabby side the past couple of days.
10) Working in customer service. Now, I love event planning here, I do. But when I tell you that our policy is "blah blah blah", don't ask why. Don't ask when it changed because then I have to pull out the policy that was written THIRTEEN FUCKING YEARS AGO and prove to you that it has been this way for a long time.
9) Speaking of number 10---when I ask a question about your event request, do me a favor? Answer the fucking question. There was no need for you to email me, my boss's boss, HIS boss and HIS boss asking me why I needed to know. Especially after you called me and I explained very clearly (and slowly) what needed clarification. You're a total bitch and I won't help you anymore...
8) Stupid people. If you remember, last fall I wrote about bad drivers and stupid people. It seems like they are breeding faster and faster. It's like cockroaches. No matter how much you squash them, they multiply! For instance, I got booted. Well, not me--my Jeep. In our parking lot, for not being cleared to park. So, on a Friday afternoon, I'm standing in a fucking parking lot paying some clown $75 to unboot my car so I can go home and drink beer--boat loads of it, actually. On Monday, I go to our parking office and tell some dipshit what happened. Her answer was a question: Do you have a parking permit? So, here's the conversation:
Her: Well, you got booted because you aren't in the system. Are you sure you have a permit?
Me: Yes, because I received a warning ticket for not having my permit visible the same day I was booted.
Her: That's why you were booted.
Me: No...that was a warning. I got booted for no clearance.
Her: Because you don't have a permit.
Me: (thinking, I'm going to stab this bitch in the throat) Yes, I do. Here's my registration
Her: Oh, well your tag number is wrong ON YOUR REGISTRATION.
Me: (HUH??? WTF??????) What do you mean?
Her: Well, it's 409 in the computer and 408 on your registration.
Me: So, someone made a typo. How do I get my money back?Her: Well, which one is correct? Your registration or the computer???
Me: (RUFKM????) Obviously the registration is correct.
Her: Are you sure?
Me: (RU FUCKING WITH ME RIGHT NOW???) *takes deep breath Yes, pretty sure the DMV has the correct tag number on my registration.....
Her: Well, it's wrong in the computer.
Me: (Voice is no longer calm and quiet) OK, so you're telling me that because someone made a typo I have to pay $75??? Really????
Me: Can you fix it in the computer?
Her: Oh, yes I can.
Me: Since I've been at work for three hours already (one hour in here, you stupid cock juggling thunder cunt) is there a chance I'm booted again?
Her: Yes, you could be. Do you have a parking permit??
Me: Yes, I do.
Her. Are you sure? I see you received a warning ticket for it not being visible last Friday.
Me: Just change the tag in the computer, please.
Her: It's done.
Me: Thank you very much. (for nothing, you stupid ignorant slut)
Now, you may wonder why I didn't say everything I was thinking. When you're dealing with the Pentagon Police Department, you just don't go saying shit like. Bad enough I made the comment, "I just wanted to kill somebody when I saw that boot." I swear, I heard someone lock and load behind me...
OK, so I thought I had ten but when I reached eight? It spooled me back up again....Maybe I'll get to the rest of them sometime later in life...